These Moments Hurt..

I see those few words,
and they destroy me.
From the one i truly care for,
my scars burn horrendously.
I try not to cry,
but all i can feel is the need to die.
My space was invaded, my
comfort revoked.
Guys don't look the same anymore,
and their words just hurt.
I feel a pain, beating in my chest.
All the guys ask.
That one question, the query,
the answer they want, i almost give.
But then i feel the awful pain,
and resist and delay.
I do not give in, because the pain
is far too severe.
I am sorry.
But i can not do this my dear.
The constant fear.
It eats me alive, for this, i cry.
No, not just once.
But i am that girl who
sits in the bathroom at lunch.
I cry out my life, i relieve the pain.
I hope that removes the scars they
all left with me.
But it doesn't so i turn to a blade.
For comfort and hope.
But it never works.