Athazagoraphobia

My hands are trembling now
My face is red and flushed
You know I'm always afraid 
Don't let me be alone anymore
I'd rather be a cold, dead corpse

Want to know I'm special
Please just tell me it now
Don't leave me like all the rest
I'm so scared I may be sick
Help me now and do it quick

I want to be irreplaceable
Like there's no one else like me
To be an original in your heart
I just want to be something
But I am nothing!

I look for the tiniest things 
That can assure me you'll never leave
Please please I beg you!
Don't do this to me!
Why can nothing gold stay

I'm so angry at this world 
Why can't it just end
No matter what you say it isn't enough
To keep me from feeling this way
Because it's all been said before

Why am I always alone
When I'm alone it's hard to fight it
The addiction raging in my body
I need to swallow those pills
Say what you will

Everyone's a liar
Everyone's a cheat
Everyone is full of shit
Nobody is who they seem
Fuck all humanity for doing this to me

Everyone leaves me in the end
I know I will be forgotten
I see through the lies
Why can't I be the one to forget
Why is my life plagued by this shit

I try and try to pull us together 
But our heart's do not beat in time
I wish someone else would try
For my sanity and well being
So I am not forgotten

I want love
I want a life where I know I matter
But everyday it slips away
Fading here
Fading my dear

So forget me
I dare you
My fear turning to hate
You'll turn around and say you care
Fuck you it's all too late

I needed you to be my rock
You're so selfish, so cruel
Never depend on the human race
If they don't stab you in the back
They'll stab you in the face

I'm fading now
Forget me nots all around
It's a kind of brutal irony
That makes me say so bitterly
All I ever wanted was to feel special

Close my eyes and dream again
All the hallucinations filling my head
I started the fight I made this bed
By just trying to feel special
I became nothing instead

Just want to know I'm the only one
Don't wait until it's too late
Show me now before I fade
Give me love that is everlasting
Make me feel special 

Before I forget myself...