Did You Even Really Care?

Clawing at this random mans back,
He isn't good enough.
I know he'll be gone in the morning,
Distance between us these days.
It's been killing me.

The road we took,
Fucked everything up.
Gasping. As this older man looks at me,
He isn't you.
The way his eyes fill with lust,
I don't want that look.

Told me I wasn't going to be alright without you,
Acknowledging you were right I didn't say a word.
Just turned out of the door,
Guy after guy.

Mother, Mother.
Is this what you wanted your son to turn into?
A cheap little whore,
Looking in the mirror I see your face staring back.

the man above me collapses,
His breathing is heavy.
Kissing my cheek he tells me how good I am,
I smile,
If I say anything the tears will come back.

Is it obvious how much I want you?
Do you even care I'm going to sleep around until I get AIDS and die?
Don't you love me?
Did you ever even care?

They'll never touch me like you did,
The tingling in my skin won't spark anymore.
I am dead,
No feelings left inside.
I'm just walking,
Wondering if you're thinking about me.

This man I have my hand in,
He isn't you.
The way he smiles,
Just shows me he's full of lust.
No feelings,
And that's the deal we made with one another.

I am dead now.