Nasty Habits

And in that moment i rested my head
thinking that maybe -just maybe
i had escaped the dreadful thoughts in my head
But then it hit me
it washed over like the sea
while i laid in this bed
i let my thoughts bleed red
all over this bed
leaving a numb and restful feeling
in my head
sort of like a drug

And now day after day
i let it consume me
swallow me up
swallow me up like the sea
Am i addicted?
is it even possible-
to be a addicted to a certain type of sadness?
maybe maybe
i rested my head
and felt the red
fall with a single tear
i don't even feel pain anymore

And now my writing is starting to get out of control
nothing makes sense anymore
this addiction is physical while
my dependency on it is mostly psychological