Moving On

There is no hope for me,
I am stuck in the mud,
Unable to move,
To breathe,

I am trying to forget you,
To forget everything,
It's so hard,
When your right there everyday,

I've given my all,
Futile and vain,
In the end I fell on my face,
Just like usual,

Regrets and tears,
As I contemplate the haunting memories,
All the smiles exchanges,
The heated passion we feel,

Slowly fading,
Departing from one another,
I turned my back,
And fell back into the dark,

You slowly destroyed me,
Decimated my hope and happiness,
And pulled me back,
Miles into the past,

I need to move on,
Become a better man,
I'm older and should know,
There's a better way to deal with this,

This razor won't dictate my life,
This food won't disgust me to no end,
I won't fear my nightmares,
I won't avoid my reflection,

I must push these feelings back,
This can't be the end of me,
I've gone through to much,
To end it all now,

I saved myself from me,
Analyzed my life,
Over and over,
And decided life is worth living,

But I have been thinking lately,
The world doesn't need another lost soul,
Another hopeless dreamer,
To consume the resources necessary for the elite,

I am just a lowly man,
Death as my only friend,
And drugs to numb the feeling,
Churning in the pit of my stomach,
Give up.