Safe Bound

There's days where I wish that you would forget me,
Where you would find a better girl,
And keep her for yourself,
A girl that could love you fully,
A girl that would be more accepting,
A girl that is more stable than I am.

But I think you've convinced yourself,
That you're in love with me.
I wish I could say it back,
Say it and mean it,
But truth is,
I'm vulnerable,
Scared that if I do love you,
That I'll just be hurt.

You're too nice to me,
Too trusting,
I'm so sorry,
I know the pain I've put you through.

I wonder,
If you ever get tired of keeping things a secret,
If you ever get tired of a girl who always cruel.

It must hurt,
Loving a girl who doesn't care.
It must be painful to watch,
From the sidelines,
And never touching her.
Does it truly hurt?
I didn't mean for it to be this way.
Why am I so foolish?

I wonder if I'm just leading you on,
If I'm just being a whore.
I wonder when you'll hate,
So you can live freely.

I try not to be cruel,
I try to be more giving,
I try to understand where you're coming from,
But I think I just take you for granted.
I don't stop and think,
Where will you be,
When I need you the most?

You're my safe area,
When I have no one,
When I can't trust anyone,
But I can't even put trust into you,
So how are you my safe area?
How much do you really mean to me?

I can't understand,
What I feel towards you.
I can't express it through words,
And here I thought I could,
But I can't.

I don't know anymore,
If it's love or if its hate.
Is it something more mutual than that?
Is it just that I like you?
Or is it something stronger than that?
I just don't know.

When will you give up on me?
When will I be strong enough to say,
That I love you back?
When will you leave me?
When will something happen?

I don't have the answers you so seek,
I don't have anything to offer to you,
And I think I barely have you,
So what else is there?

I wish I was more crazy and wild,
Maybe then I could face my fears,
But I'm not,
Everyone has taken a little bit,
Of the eccentric part of me,
So, I have none left to give you.
I'm sorry.

We're like a magnets,
We can separate,
But we always come back together,
Do we know why?
What force holds us together?
Is it something we both share,
Or it just because we feel safe with each other?