I Hate Having a Love Life, Especially When You're Involved

I miss you.
I love you.
I can't explain.
I can't deny this fact.
I can't quit this regret.
I can't quit being mad.
I wish I wasn't so oblivious.
I wish I realized my deep down feelings.
I wish to take everything back but loving you.
I want to take back cheating.
I want to take back all the hurt.
I want to take back all the pain.
All the tears.
All the stress and conflicts.
If I could see you.
If I could talk to you.
If I could hug you.
Kiss you.
Love you
But,that time is gone.
That stage is gone.
I'm on it with a noose in hand
With a drink in hand
With a knife in hand
With scars on my mind
With blood from my broken heart dripping.
You'll find me feeling sorry deep down.
You'll find me feeling mad deep down.
I'm sure this bitterness won't change.
I'm sure this is an on going theme.
I'm sure this heart will be lasting.