New

I still smell you on my pillow at night. The musk scent that drives me close to insanity. You were so close, yet so far away and there was nothing I could do to save you. The way that you looked as we held our hands together, so close, so tightly I thought it would never end. The feeling that you gave me when our lips touched, just for a moment before I gave in. It all hollows me out, and then fills me with loneliness and yet at the same time, relief. The way I love you is too much to hold on to. It breaks my inner being into a thousand pieces and I have yet to pick them all up. It crushes me down to nothing, but at the same time it becomes me. It assures me as to who I am. It defines me.
Everything overwhelms me, and I can't hold it in any more. I need to scream and let everything I am go, and become something wonderful. Something pure. Something new. I need to become new.