Masochist

Why do I hurt myself?
I know you don't love me
But I want you too

Like jumping out the
tenth floor window
of a burning building
I run from getting hurt
to being hurt some more..

I'm so fed up of this
Yet I'm responsible

I hate it
Sometimes I wish to be alone
But loneliness is what I fear..

I return like a dog
To its brutish master
The names and faces change
But its always the same

I fuck myself
Over and over again
how could someone do that,
to themselves.
Do I even love me.

Maybe it's time
To make a real change
for I feel myself withering away
like ashes in the wind.