Nuisance....

That forgotten blade
comes into my mind again
I don't know what's wrong with me
I want to do it,
but I don't want to hurt the ones I love.
I feel like a burden, like I don't belong
I feel like they're all pretending to be my friend
I don't know what to think anymore
it hurts to think that way
I had thought I was over being this way....
thought I had gotten over the pain
I was wrong....
Now the tears stain these pages
forever marking my sadness
these people mock me
showing me what I never could be
I miss when I didn't think this way
Now the ink filling this pen and these pages
is being wasted by a stupid girl.
I have fears I wish to forget.
I really do..
I know I'm NOT alone,
So, why do I feel this way?
I'm a nuisance
that's all I'll ever be
Forever and always
longer than eternity.
I miss not feeling this way.
I had thought I had gotten better
But I was wrong...
Oh.....how I was wrong..