But If I Was in Control I Wouldn't Cut

I said that I wouldn’t tell anyone, but I got drunk and took my pants off.

She saw my cuts.

I’m cutting again..

We were drunk.

She’s my best friend.

She doesn’t remember.

She asked me what happened

Devin interrupted us because he had to pee.

She doesn’t rememeber.

my best friend in the whole entire fucking world,

doesn’t rememeber that I took a blade to my thighs




Only three.

This is the second time I’ve relapsed since nine months free.

She doesn’t rememeber

The girl who knew I once was so depressed
That I couldn’t go an hour without cutting myself.

I’m in control.

I’ve said that every time.

But If I was in control.

I wouldn’t cut