Her and You

She's the ever present fog
in the back of my mind,
a text always on my phone.
but here you are in front of me,
right before my eyes.

you ask me, "do you love Her?"
and i say
of course i do.
but it's almost a silly feeling
compared to the love i felt for you
when you brought that
blade to your wrist and fell to the floor.

i tell you things aren't good with Her now.
and you just look
and you shrug.
we stand by the railing,
look over the city,
and bask in the lights of the stars.

i figure it's time you leave
before i think things i shouldn't.
so i let myself go quiet,
knowing you'll get the hint.

you smile, descend the ladder.
and i banish you from my thoughts.
promise myself maybe i shouldn't see you again,
but know it's what i want.