.....I'll be

with no goodbyes, i’ll stop my the beating that destroys me and disappear in the rain. i’ll let it cover me like the darkness that follows, I"ll try to think fly when I jump. the ache in my chest is becoming too much, I can’t even cry, how pathetic am i? , i hope one day maybe they’ll think back to this day and realize I didn’t jump but was pushed by their hands.

I won’t lie and I won’t paint beauty into my pain because it’s far from that, it’s more than that. don’t i deserve the truth in my last days. my pain is not a joke, not some false tale of a lost soul. damaged and treated like the dirt you scrap off your shoes.

if that is really what you think of me then okay.

i’ll become the blood on your hands and the crack in your heart that never heals. I’ll become the tears in your eyes I never shed when you hurt me. I’ll become the screams I always had to hold inside.

I’ll become your haunting memory.