Letters to You

Ive just been thinking a lot
And I know how much you love me,
Bht im just not sure that I could ever love myself.
Maybe this isn't what I want,
But I sure as hell know
I don't want to live like this anymore
And im so fucking tired
Of slitting my wrists and
My body being a canvas.
I should have just downed pills the first time.
And maybe im not ready now,
But im getting awfully close.
When they search my room and
Find all of the plans and the
Pills, blades, weed, letters to you...
Know that I had been in a bad place
For a very long time and
Nothing anyone did could
Stop this from happening.
Just know when you're asleep,
I'll be there when I couldn't before.
Know that I will always hold your hand,
I will make sure the train tracks are clear.
After all, ive never met anyone
Who wishes for runaway trains like I do.
Just promise me to stop hurting yourself.
Maybe im a hypocrite,
But you're worth so much more than I am.
I'm worthless.
You? You shine. You sparkle and you glow.
Make beautiful things, write heartbreaking words.
When you cant think, talk to me.
I'll hear you always,
Ni matter how many feet under they bury me.
I've always loved you. Never forget.
Until we meet again.
Love always.