I Wish I Had Known

Don't pull this.
Like you cared all along.
You probably didn't remember my name until you read it in the newspaper.
It's sad really, your attempts at redemption.

I accomplished so much, yet so little for the time being.
But you wouldn't know that,
Would you?

Maybe we went to school together.
Maybe we met at a mutual function.

But you were among the ones who tormented me.
You whispered with the others, "Bitch." "Fat ass."

Yet now you're interested in me.
In who I am, in what I have to say.

Well I was a human being.
With feelings that were hurt by others, every day.

Not a day went by where I wasn't somehow struck by my crippling insecurities.
Not a day went by where I didn't feel like I was in the middle of a crowded room;
Screaming for someone to help me.

But no-one ever did.

And yet, all it ever took for you to pay attention,
After all of this time,
All it took for you to notice who I was, was for me to be six feet under.

-Z