"Traces"

There are reasons I didn't allow it all--
All those simple things that were natural to do.
Because every memory after I'm gone
Would become another way to torture you.
The pictures would just become a mirror
To a future you knew we could never have.
They would capture a moment you should forget--
A remembrance of what's already passed.
A song that was ours would haunt you so,
Echoing easily throughout your day.
It was another tie I couldn't allow,
So that you wouldn't hold onto me that way.
I refused to go to your house again and again,
Because sooner or later I'd leave you behind.
I didn't want to be where you are so often,
Nor leave any trace of me to remind.
You don't need the pain I'm going through now--
To see the other every where you step.
If I had wanted to be mean, I'd have given in to you,
And left traces of me so you'd never forget.