Misunderstanding

I'm not exactly sad. But I'm not exactly
happy either. I mean, I am happy
sometimes. Like when you look at me with
those eyes, a color somewhere between a
lost green and hope blue, and say something
that makes me reminisce on the afternoons when
you didn't have that place on the other
side of the world to go to everyday. Those
are the times when I can say I am happy.
But I'm sad sometimes too. Like the sad I
look out my too cloudy, black tented window
and see you grab her hand; a sign of affection you
never showed to me. Or when I see you two stop
at the end of the day to kiss goodbye and part ways
although one of you ends up staying. Or, my
favorite, when I watch you write those
poems about my wondering blue eyes and
sunshine smile that were really
always
about
her.

..

What do you do when you're in love with someone who has made it perfectly clear they will never care about you? .. I feel like shit guys.
♥ ,the ghost girl.