Anxiety

Have you ever sat awake at night, really sat down and thought, and wondered
why you're still all alone?
Why when you speak to a stranger your chest suddenly tightens
and you just want to go back home?
But when you're finally home, all you want to do is go out with friends
and you're stuck because you have none?
So you want to make more, you want to talk to people and experience things,
but the moment you open your mouth it's like you're underwater
without a breathing tank and
Tiny fish are swimming into your lungs, there's another diver nearby
but they just watch you and back away
And you're stuck.
Your face turns blue and you can't move, so your fingers turn to ice.
You open your mouth to speak, but nothing comes out,
"SAY SOMETHING YOU IDIOT, ANYTHING WORKS,"
You can scream inside your head, but your mouth stays shut and you wonder
what you ever did wrong to find yourself in this situation
and soon you're on your knees, on the floor, in the middle of the room,
People are laughing like it's some kind of standing ovation
at a comedy skit and you are anxious beyond belief
You take out your cellphone to make a call
but no one's home
You're out of breath, you're out of time, the tears
that run down your face taste of salt and the bitter realization that you are
alone.
You are still all alone.