Obsessive Mind (Was It All a Lie)

Did you whisper the word 'baby' into her ear too?
Did you kiss her as passionately as I kissed you?
I wonder these sadistic things about you
You seemed like an enigma
Or was that a lie too?

I wondered and that's why I couldn't see
I pleaded with myself to believe
In the ruse, the fantasy
You were an idea that,
When realized,
Fell flat

You were nothing close to what I wanted you to be.

Maybe it's good that your leaving
Maybe I needed to find the strength
To speak the words I have written
Over what seems like a thousand times

And page after page it's the same thing
For once I need to be selfish
And do what is right for me

And that's the thing
I have no idea what's right

All I know is in order for me
To be
Happy
I need you
Out of sight
To try to let you
Out of the
Entrapment
Of my obsessive mind.