Caught

It's like this
I wanna be free
No judgement implied
But it's not me
No wonder I lied

I tell them sweet nothings
Believe what they want
I've given up on everything
Do I always have to be such a cunt?

But something inside me
won't let me hide
Something wont let me be
I can't enjoy the ride

I'm caught in this web
Of boys, Lies, and sex
I'm kind of enjoying it
At least that's how it looks to my ex

I don't know where I'm headed
I've lost control of the wheel
I really want to be rid of
my scars so I can heal

Yet I keep adding more
each obstacle I face
I feel like a whore
Like I'm a disgrace

I have no more faith
In friends and family
I can't even hold my place
Why would I give any?

I'm starting to get lost
fall out of line
I'm such a bad host
i'm not feeling to fine

I need to stop this
But I don't know how
There's poison in your kiss
But I need it now

Please help me
I don't want to regret anymore
Don't leave
I just want to be sure

I am so alone