A Test of Strength vs. the Power of Pain

I just wanted to feel intriguing
Like I wasn’t always under a spell of fatiguing
So I changed my how my head thought
The fear overtook me, of getting caught
But if I didn’t become interesting, I would be forgotten
Maybe I was even becoming a piece of flesh, rotting

There was a point when my mind, I needed to analyze
It was time for myself to look at I and tantalize
All those parts of me that seemed weak
I just gave a little tweak
The sadness that had possessed me for so long
Was something I felt I needed to belong

I picked apart at myself until no more could I take
If I changed my whole being I felt an ache of being fake
But without changing who I was, how was I supposed to move beyond?
Beyond the need with my memories to abscond
Without the change, I wouldn’t be able to forget my pain
But with the differing mental viewpoints, what would I even gain?

I look back on the leap of faith I took
And at my change I have my head shock
Regret overtakes me in waves
But I chose to stop being one of pain’s slaves
Maybe this wasn’t a terrible change
Just a test of my strength’s range