It's Been a Year

There was once a day when everything was beautiful,
Not this soul numbin grey.
My life was planned out and something to be proud of,
I was someone that was worthy of love.
But a year has passed since then,
And I was touched by nasty evil mean once again.
I lost something of myself that day,
What it is, I'm not sure I can say.
Six months of nothing but alcohol and drugs,
When all I wanted was kisses and hugs.
I met someone new,
But I still just want you.
She's sweet and a little wild,
Someone I might have wanted as a child.
I won't ever walk down the isle,
I think I'm still in denial.
So tonight I tip my glass to you,
Because you don't know what this heartbreak put me through.
I spend countless hours alone,
My heart is stuck in this endless, broken zone.
So tell me?
Are you happy?
Because all I wanted was your happiness in the end,
Even if my heart was broken to the point it wouldn't mend.
I wish I could talk to you as friends some days,
But I won't ever have that in this fucked up haze.
So I hope your happy and I mean it,
Because I hope you got something perfect out of this shit.
Sweetness please smile,
Because crying is out of style.
Put down the drugs and live,
Because my battle scarred heart is all I have left to give.