Besmirched by Caverns and Cells Without Windows

You tore my throne out
From under me
Before I enveloped my body
Upon the fabric of defeat
You tore my crown off
From where it perched compliantly
Upon my dainty head
And I was the wrong kind of royalty
Before we met
Besmirched by caverns and cells without windows
I couldn't fill my lungs with one fresh breath
And as I rest my tired head
On so-o-omething stable I've never known
I wonder just how long this will last
Or are the rocks starting to turn and shake
Are there bones creeping out from haunted graves?
Of a past left behind and stories left untold
Do you think screaming sounds as musical
As ripping out a throat?
Or should I repeat
I have never hurt myself more
Than leaving a part of me behind in you
Far too soon.
And bloodshed has never been more treacherous
Than it has. . . with you
And you don't hear the words I screech
Through the lumps in my throat
That stop the impulsive thoughts
The letters strung together in murky waters
I don't know what I'm thinking at all
Could you remind me, how tall am I
If I feel so small
A pigment
An atom
A cell
(Don't matter)
Insignificant
I swear you can't hear it
The truth is I am not what you think
I don't keep my head up, I keep my eyes glued to the ground
I am more myself when I'm alone
And in pain and in tears and lonely
Than I ever was as an accessory
(Hopeless lovers; love - a word filled with a sigh)
A piece, draped on an arm, stronger than the depths of my
Torn up insides, the guts that I ingest, hide, and fetch
When I need the adrenaline rush
Can you hear me?
Or are these words too honest for you to believe?
I can't look unless I know for certain
That you're listening to these burdens.