Your Ghost

Is it because I don't love you anymore?
That my skin starts to boil
When you get anywhere close to me
Is it because I don't care anymore
That my mouth gets dry when I sound out your name
Is it because I'm losing everything I had close to me
That my bones feel light, sometimes I wonder if
I could fly

You live in my thoughts and you sing in my heart
I want to slide a knife through my skull
I want to bleed you out from my organs
I cannot lie through my lips
Every boy I kiss is only an attempt to spit
your bitter taste off, yet

Sometimes I exfoliate extra hard just to try
and scrub off your touch from months ago
When I smell your particular scent
I turn my head around like a dumb owl
Only to find some other guy behind me
It makes me grind my teeth

You're the dirt underneath my fingernails
You're the dead skin soaked into my mattress
And once in a while I laugh like an idiot
to the memory of our noses bumping into each other
I know for certain you laugh about it too

Is it because I don't you anymore
That your ghost lingers on me?