Do You Not Know I'm A Fighter?

You try to keep me
Tied down to your peace and love
Do you not know that I'm a fighter?
I break away, I grow up strong only to
Weakly climbing back into your bed,
Warm with promises of forever.
Do you not know that I'm a masochist?
I lay awake, my body trapped by
Drugged drowsiness, weighed down with
Stress and excess fear
But my mind is alive.
Tears roll down my face,
Eyes full of blood and light and pain
Gone when I drift asleep, lost to
More pleasant hallucinations.
Do you not know that I'm morbid?
I wish for death, in the healthiest way possible;
Curiosity leads me to ponder abysmal dark
Wondering, wondering,
I lay awake, a bed warm with
Promises of forever that is
Away when I contemplate lonely worlds,
Aching hearts torn apart by careless calculation.
Do you not know that I was never good at math?
I know two and two make four,
But we are a three;
I'm not quite there.
I wander not because I don't love you,
But because I've fallen for them.
Do you not know that I'm a fighter?
You can't keep me here forever.