Holding Onto You

Holding onto you,
Like a tattoo,
But I fear the sudden pain,
Can’t lose you again.

I can’t undo,
What I did to you,
I can’t think,
You’re gone when I blink.

Healing my bones,
Took out too many loans,
I can’t pay the cost,
And I seem to be so lost.

I hear your voice,
In the darkness,
I had no choice,
To feel helpless.

I gave anything,
I lost everything.

I risked my name,
Put my faith to shame.

Just for you,
Yet now I undo,
Everything,
That was working.

I wish I could go back,
Regain all that I lack.

Free this pain within,
Live not in vain.
I wish I could begin,
All over again.

But in dignity,
Always free.

It’s my responsibility,
To let myself be me.

Cos it was you who made me see,
When I thought I was blind,
You healed me,
And helped me to find.

Peace,
A release.

A part of me,
Lost to the sea,
Always will be,
In me when I’m free.

Because you taught me to see,
Now it is my responsibility,
To be what I want to be,
And to live in tranquillity.

Forever and always,
In my leftover days.

Free.
To be ME.