Parties With No Alcohol and the Girls Who Need It

We stand so still still
Numb in the cold and terrified
We talk about ourselves
As if we were ghosts from long ago
And sticks clatter down trees in the distant darkness
We laugh
And joke
About our fears
How the night is just so scary
And how we are freezing
We know it’s not just the evening and
It’s not just the fucking cold
We stay silent thinking of
Million dollar homes
Million dollar drones
We stay silent and weighed down.
We stand so high on that hill
In our cheap heels
But we are drowning
We look into the night
So black and empty and we
Feel the hunger in our bellies
And our wallets
Why eat when you can feel your sadness cripple you
And gobble you up from the inside out?
Why not feel empty just like the
Shiny wallets stuffed into our bags
Like an after thought
Empty
But dust and crumbs
We are glamorous
We are dark and sinister
We are the cool girls
Talking about sex like its taking sups of water.
We stand in our nice black clothes for a party
But we know
Silently
We are really dressed for our funerals
We are drowning and
We refuse to raise our hands towards the sun
All blurry from under the water
It burns on the way down
And it’s so cold in our bones
But the sun is so much hotter
And we can’t even see land from here
So why not sink
All those songs about kids our age
About anchors and shorelines
We thought they were jokes and lies
We stand on the hill listening to the sounds of the night
And we silently pray
That there is something in the shadows
That will fucking take us away.