Blizzard

i looked for wood to make a fire because in a blizzard, fire made me warm and happy.
we did that thing that makes you feel tired, that makes your eyes bloodshot and look funny.
i kissed that boy for hours and hours, sometimes without ever touching his lips.
a normal life seem too normal and i hated when i lived in it.
she and i got so close when i told her my darkest secret, and its what we had in common.
but he was sad and i felt broken and doing that thing didn't help.
he saw me in my most delicate clothing which made his secret come out.
we were all broken and fighting demons, but instead of fighting together we fought for ourselves.
i lost connection to the normal world and didn't care about coming back.
so devils grew and sinners sinned and we just didn't give a fuck.
acting smart was the stupidest thing we could have done because feeling strong made us more transparent.
i hurt her because she hurt him while he hurt us.
i kept secrets that everyone knew and those secrets made me want to put out the fire.
but i was still so cold.
i dug to deep and lost sight of her because i was so into him because he was so into me.
but i hated when i tasted blood but he liked when he tasted me.
and i fed the demons as the ones who cared fought to take them down.
but when we fell i fell harder because i let him fall on top.
and there we stood for hours and hours as my heart caved in.
so i did my best for her and her and returned to my normal world.
i felt warmth but disconnection, as we forgot our burden lives.
and today life seems pleasant and not so cold, but as for him and her i know no more.