"Tragic Madness"

My heart hurts when I think of you
And my ears ring with untold sadness.
The anger, the pain, the swallowed words,
All fill my head with tragic madness.
My hands tremble from one memory
And my eyes leak recalling your name.
The heat that sweeps up to my cheeks,
Cast my eyes downward in embarrassed shame.
My skin prickles with an icy chill
And this selfless worth is all that now stands out.
The blindness that covered my eyes completely,
Shed all your truths with blackened doubt.
My throat closes just remembering
And my eyes flash with glimpses of that year.
Convincing myself with made-up fantasies,
When the nightmare remains so belying-ly clear.
My mind goes blank when I see you around
And I fake a smile that breaks me a little more.
Running from the reality that's not what you had promised,
I'm trying to fix the heart you still ignore.
My chest tightens when I think of you,
Recalling your face leaves such a bitter taste.
All the time, the effort, the love I gave,
Leaves me drained to know you were such a waste.