Drinking

It’s raining
And all I can think of is
Pouring myself another cup of coffee
But you said that it’s getting unhealthy
This dependency
Of drinking to keep me awake
That it’s no difference
To drinking so I’d fall asleep
I don’t do that anymore because
You taught me drowning my demons is wrong
So I’ve decided to keep awake
And talk to them instead
Maybe if I got to know them they’d go away
Or they’d grow on me and I’d let them stay
You can get used to this sinking feeling
That you’d actually like it
A wave of an uneasy feeling sweeps me off
When I don’t feel this way
You can get used to this sinking feeling
That you’d actually miss it
And I could care less if it’s three and I’ve slept less
Than the amount of times you’ve talked to me
Yes, I am a mess
And you said that it’s getting unhealthy
This dependency
Of drinking to keep me awake
That it’s no difference
To drinking so I’d fall asleep
I don’t do that anymore because
You taught me drowning my demons is wrong
So I’ve decided to keep awake
And talk to them instead
Maybe if I got to know them they’d go away
Or they’d grow on me and I’d let them stay
I’m waiting for you to tell me this is unhealthy
This dependency
To need you to keep me able
I haven’t slept in days on end
You’re probably fast asleep
I really don’t want this to end
The fall is far too steep
You taught me drowning my demons is wrong
So I’ve decided to keep awake
And talk to them instead
Maybe if I got to know them they’d go away
Or they’d grow on me and I’d let them stay
They’ll replace the hole you’ve made