I Don't Have a Pen

I am a diary
Yes, I am yours
You whisper to me
Tell me the pain you feel
Not lies but whats real
The way you talk to me is unique
Not cheap gossip
But what you're seriously feeling
It's special because I'm here for you
And you trust me
But
Is that all I am to you
Just something that is consistent in your life
You don't talk to anyone else this way
I don't judge, I always listen
But I cant say the same about you
Words coming from you are meant for me and no one else
But where do my words go
They are trapped inside of me, hidden under your words
The words that were unceremoniously dropped there
Once you're done the book is closed
And I am left sad
Left alone
My pages are crying
Because they're almost full
Once I'm out will you throw me aside
Put me in a drawer
And buy a new diary
Where will I go
I can't have a diary
So what am i suppose to do with my words
I don't have a pen
Where will my words go
I'm just a diary
They need to go somewhere
I don't want my words, yours are enough
But then again
The words you've been giving me are different than they used to be
The words given to me are hollow, numb
Are you just sad because you know you'll have to throw me away soon?
Will you be upset when I'm gone
You've moved on to reality
Leaving me alone with the sad fantasy that used to belong to you