I Think to Myself...
There are times when I’m standing at the corner,
waiting to cross the street, and I’m looking down the road,
watching as the cars are coming closer and closer and I think to myself…
There are times I pause at the top of the stairs,
looking at the bottom of them,
trying to remember how many of them there are, and I think to myself…
There are times when I’m using something sharp,
and I pause for a moment looking at it’s edge…and I think to myself..
There are times I stand in front of a window,
looking at the ground, and I think to myself…
‘Would it be quick?’
‘Would it hurt?’
‘Is it really that sharp?’
‘Am I high enough?’
I put one foot in front of the other…and I think to myself..
One foot hovers in open air…and I think to myself…
The instrument gets closer…and I think to myself…
I place one hand against the glass…and I think to myself…
‘Just a few more steps.’
‘Just don’t put it down.’
‘Just place, add pressure, and pull.’
‘Just open it.’
I think to myself…’Why not?'
I think to myself… ‘It would be easy.’
I think to myself…’It would be worth it.’
I think to myself…’No one can stop me.’
I think to myself…’No would even try.’
I think to myself…’It would be the best thing I’ve ever done.’
I think to myself…’No one would miss me.’
I think to myself…’Would they?’
I think to myself…’Thinking about it is harmless…it’s when I stop thinking about it that I should tell someone…’
I think to myself…’Then it’ll be too late…’
And then I do it.
I continue to walk across the street, and don’t look back. I have some place to be.
I place my foot firmly on the top of the next step, and continue on down. I have things to do.
I continue to cut whatever it was I was using the sharp object on. I have something to finish making.
I walk away from the window. I have no reason for it to be open right now.
I think to myself…’I just might be missed.’
I think to myself…’Not today.’
I think to myself…’For now, I win.’
I think to myself…’but maybe next time.’
I think to myself…’I’m fine.’
waiting to cross the street, and I’m looking down the road,
watching as the cars are coming closer and closer and I think to myself…
There are times I pause at the top of the stairs,
looking at the bottom of them,
trying to remember how many of them there are, and I think to myself…
There are times when I’m using something sharp,
and I pause for a moment looking at it’s edge…and I think to myself..
There are times I stand in front of a window,
looking at the ground, and I think to myself…
‘Would it be quick?’
‘Would it hurt?’
‘Is it really that sharp?’
‘Am I high enough?’
I put one foot in front of the other…and I think to myself..
One foot hovers in open air…and I think to myself…
The instrument gets closer…and I think to myself…
I place one hand against the glass…and I think to myself…
‘Just a few more steps.’
‘Just don’t put it down.’
‘Just place, add pressure, and pull.’
‘Just open it.’
I think to myself…’Why not?'
I think to myself… ‘It would be easy.’
I think to myself…’It would be worth it.’
I think to myself…’No one can stop me.’
I think to myself…’No would even try.’
I think to myself…’It would be the best thing I’ve ever done.’
I think to myself…’No one would miss me.’
I think to myself…’Would they?’
I think to myself…’Thinking about it is harmless…it’s when I stop thinking about it that I should tell someone…’
I think to myself…’Then it’ll be too late…’
And then I do it.
I continue to walk across the street, and don’t look back. I have some place to be.
I place my foot firmly on the top of the next step, and continue on down. I have things to do.
I continue to cut whatever it was I was using the sharp object on. I have something to finish making.
I walk away from the window. I have no reason for it to be open right now.
I think to myself…’I just might be missed.’
I think to myself…’Not today.’
I think to myself…’For now, I win.’
I think to myself…’but maybe next time.’
I think to myself…’I’m fine.’