Cheers for Innocence

when i was little
i used to sit in your lap
you would bounce your leg up and down
and i would laugh whole heartedly

i never realized you were sick
i don't think it even sunk in
when you were rushed to the hospital
or when the second couch
became a hospital bed

even when you were lying there
hanging on during your last days
i held on to the idea
that you would get better

now
not a day goes by
that i don't miss you

and i would do anything
for one more hug
just to hear you speak
even if you were just asking me
to scratch your back for you

sometimes
i catch a scent
of what you smelt like
stale cigarettes
mixed with something else

i miss you
i love you
forever in my heart
you will rest