Cigarettes

When we first met your hair was longer than mine
Now it's shorter than mine will ever be
Please keep changing

When we first started talking you messaged me a few times a week
When we started dating we talked less
And now we don't talk at all
Please keep changing

You said that you would always be here and that you'd always love me
Now you're with another girl and you probably tell her those things

Four cigarettes down since I started writing
Maybe if I start tasting like them you might love me again
Because I know how much you loved cigarettes

Cigarette after cigarette after cigarette after cigarette

I don't really know why you smoked so much
You just did, a lot

You were like an ashtray
Completely fucking useless
I could've used anything else but I chose you

I chose you to dump all of my feelings into
Maybe you were the closest thing to me and maybe I thought you were a good idea and oh shit I was wrong

Because now I long for you touch
But when I think of it actually happening I get too scared

If I could go back in time I would punch myself in the face and tell myself
"Keep smoking
Keep smoking cigarettes
Keep fucking smoking
Because that boy is more addicting than any tobacco product
But with tobacco you at least get a warning
And if one day we die due to too much damage to our lungs
It's still a happier ending than with him
Don't bother with boys
Don't bother with girls
Keep your lighter and smokes near
Because you got a warning so don't blame them
So take that and run
Don't look for a soul mate because they probably already found someone better
Just keep smoking and if it makes our lives shorter then be happy because we won't get a happy ending in the end anyway"