When All Is Black

When all is black,
And all is dark,
When you look back,
And find no spark.

When you lose someone,
Someone you love,
And you look back for them,
They’re up above.

When you lose someone,
A few of your friends,
Then you find the gun,
Consider making it the end.

When you take the blade,
And cut deep, and deeper,
All the cards you played,
They just… disappear.

When you stop and think,
Then the realisation sinks… in,
And you realise when you blink,
That you’re actually crying.

And your purpose becomes insignificant,
Your life proves to be worthless,
Your hopes you believe are magnificent,
So, for you, they are hopeless.

When you look in the mirror,
And take a long hard look at yourself,
All you see is a deserter,
For you deserted yourself when you needed help.

When all is black,
And all feels gone,
Then you look back,
And find someone.

Grandma is here,
She’s here right now,
She’ll dry that tear,
She’ll cheer you up somehow.

Memories are here,
And yes, they are painful,
Because they remind you,
Of what’s lost, but be hopeful.

For these memories will stay,
Unlike those friends of yours,
And they will remain everyday,
Until you choose for them to be no more.

Have faith in light,
When all is back,
And someday, life,
Will have your back.
♠ ♠ ♠
I can't break myself out of this circle of anxiety and what feels like depression, so I'll try writing.