Inexpressable

Dear boyfriend,
Can I be frank with you?
You’re giving me writers’ block.
My hands ache from typing, erasing, typing, erasing
Nothing is ever worthy enough for your eyes
(or even to simply describe them)
(they’re literally like chocolate, you know)
Who am I these days?
It seems like this monster,
This instigator of crushes
Has stolen my creativity in place of your heart in my hands
It is most frustrating to try and tell you
You’re the air and I’m just a little ant
I live for you, work for you, breathe you in
It’s worth breaking my back just to keep you around
I would circle the Earth time and time again
If it meant I could keep making you smile.
And you are also radiant like the sun,
Your smile burns me up in the best way
I don’t need sunblock because your light is here to stay
Bleach me with your intense ultraviolet love
What can I do?
I can’t even measure the amount of times
I’ve told myself to hold on,
Just because it meant I could remain here, with you
Have I butchered that line, too?
Oops.
Like I said, writer’s block
I think I missed my cue
The part where I was supposed to say that
I love you.
I do.
I love you,
Even when you’re sad
Weak
Angry
I’ll take you every day I can
I want to hold your hand.
My feelings for you are…
Ineffable.
I’m sorry I’m not competent
I’m sorry I’m a little bit crazy sometimes.
But I’ll spend my whole life making an anthill
If it means you’ll always be mine.