Marrow
I'm more lonely than I've ever been before
It feel like I'm stuck in the 1st circle
Limbo, purgatory, with other souls
That can never truly know each other
No, it's my own isolation
Coursing single file through my veins
In solitary red blood cells
Seeping through my pores, hanging in the air
Being caught in my aura of perpetual silence
Muffling my words and weighing down my heart
I swear, I'll never sleep at night again
My world is deserted, all doors are closed and locked
While I roam the building alone
Because it's getting too cold outside for me
To go and burn a few more nails into my coffin
So I'll just walk real slow and listen to
My footsteps echo down the stairwell
That leads to nowhere special
The ache behind my eyeballs
The pressure on my chest
The burning in the back of my throat
The wait for a sleep that is too short
For a day that lasts too long and a night
As empty as the rest, just let me be
And I will bury myself in my own little world
Of blankets and bad dreams
Cuddling my tired liver
Snuggling my wheezing lungs
Wishing they were you
I don't know which is worse-
The thought of those deeper circles of my soul
Where I've drowned in the much of forgetfulness
Where I've been entombed by my hatred, burned by my rage
Frozen up to my neck in mistakes, regrets and traitorous tears
-Or this bare existence, which once included
Every one of you who made me believe
That life is more than this, but
I have seen enough rainbows to know by now
That it is just as cold at the end
And the grass is just as dead
As it is everywhere else
See, I'm the elephant in the room that makes
Everyone uncomfortable, even myself
And still, I wonder what it is that makes
Friends pretend not to notice each other
And walk in opposite directions
They're either against you
Or against you, so I'll just stay
Alone with my fate, until I fade away
Like the pencil on this paper, until I end up
As just a name on a little plastic cup of pills
Or a cross on the side of the road buried in snow
What's one more broken bone
In a world full of broken people?
What's one more unheard voice
In a world full of fucking gunshots?
(as if i even know what I should say)
What's one more polluted river
In a world full of acid rain?
What's one more shitty poem
In a world full of shitty writers?
See, I'm a walking disappointment
They say that death wields a scythe
No, death wields hopelessness and despair
And loneliness, it sits behind my eyelids
And in my brain stem, it catches life in a trap
Like a little bird and clips its wings
So that it may never soar free like it was meant to
And the times I'm feeling happy are just kindly death
Letting me out of my cage for a little while
Before it carves its way into some ancient stone
And buries me in everything
That I have ever feared
If you ever feel that feeling of impending doom
That crawling on your skin, that chill down your spine
That's me, cursing my fate
Savaging the fucking world
With my bare and broken hands
I can feel the blood underneath my fingernails
I can taste the sweet marrow on my tongue
If only I had the power, but I am powerless
I am nothing, less than nothing, everything I ever said I hated
The sun will die, the stars will fall to earth
Before I find a deeper hole to lie in
And dissolve, like salt in the blood of a wound
Like a moth burning in the flame of it's own heart
Like one nightmare into another
Until the world ends
It feel like I'm stuck in the 1st circle
Limbo, purgatory, with other souls
That can never truly know each other
No, it's my own isolation
Coursing single file through my veins
In solitary red blood cells
Seeping through my pores, hanging in the air
Being caught in my aura of perpetual silence
Muffling my words and weighing down my heart
I swear, I'll never sleep at night again
My world is deserted, all doors are closed and locked
While I roam the building alone
Because it's getting too cold outside for me
To go and burn a few more nails into my coffin
So I'll just walk real slow and listen to
My footsteps echo down the stairwell
That leads to nowhere special
The ache behind my eyeballs
The pressure on my chest
The burning in the back of my throat
The wait for a sleep that is too short
For a day that lasts too long and a night
As empty as the rest, just let me be
And I will bury myself in my own little world
Of blankets and bad dreams
Cuddling my tired liver
Snuggling my wheezing lungs
Wishing they were you
I don't know which is worse-
The thought of those deeper circles of my soul
Where I've drowned in the much of forgetfulness
Where I've been entombed by my hatred, burned by my rage
Frozen up to my neck in mistakes, regrets and traitorous tears
-Or this bare existence, which once included
Every one of you who made me believe
That life is more than this, but
I have seen enough rainbows to know by now
That it is just as cold at the end
And the grass is just as dead
As it is everywhere else
See, I'm the elephant in the room that makes
Everyone uncomfortable, even myself
And still, I wonder what it is that makes
Friends pretend not to notice each other
And walk in opposite directions
They're either against you
Or against you, so I'll just stay
Alone with my fate, until I fade away
Like the pencil on this paper, until I end up
As just a name on a little plastic cup of pills
Or a cross on the side of the road buried in snow
What's one more broken bone
In a world full of broken people?
What's one more unheard voice
In a world full of fucking gunshots?
(as if i even know what I should say)
What's one more polluted river
In a world full of acid rain?
What's one more shitty poem
In a world full of shitty writers?
See, I'm a walking disappointment
They say that death wields a scythe
No, death wields hopelessness and despair
And loneliness, it sits behind my eyelids
And in my brain stem, it catches life in a trap
Like a little bird and clips its wings
So that it may never soar free like it was meant to
And the times I'm feeling happy are just kindly death
Letting me out of my cage for a little while
Before it carves its way into some ancient stone
And buries me in everything
That I have ever feared
If you ever feel that feeling of impending doom
That crawling on your skin, that chill down your spine
That's me, cursing my fate
Savaging the fucking world
With my bare and broken hands
I can feel the blood underneath my fingernails
I can taste the sweet marrow on my tongue
If only I had the power, but I am powerless
I am nothing, less than nothing, everything I ever said I hated
The sun will die, the stars will fall to earth
Before I find a deeper hole to lie in
And dissolve, like salt in the blood of a wound
Like a moth burning in the flame of it's own heart
Like one nightmare into another
Until the world ends