Parade of a Dying Soul

The third night I've been up partying. Another night I can only regret. Going places I should never be. Starts with a beer, then 20. Next I score some coke. Always more then plenty. With each line I feel more angry and ashamed. Relapse always hurts, until it doesn't. We get kicked out of bar after bar as usual. There's Travis, I know he will have some heroine. Head to the parking lot, cook a hit up in my truck. Share this needle with my junkie friend. It doesn't matter though. It's not the first time. Black out, come to, do more coke. Head back in the bar again. I was talking to some bar slut. What's her name? Fuck I don't know. It doesn't matter though. I leave Debs in the bar. Back to the parking lot but with the girl this time. We fuck with the door to my truck open, I lay her across the seat in plain sight of anyone coming or going. I still don't know her name. It doesn't matter though. Back in the bar, more shots. We start a fight over a game of pool. I get sucker punched so I break a cue over a guy. Cops are coming. We bail. On to the next scene. I stop in a random parking lot, cook another hit. Shit it is so good. More coke. The coke is cut so it's shit. Should have used my guy. It doesn't matter though. We head to this party. Mostly sluts and meth heads. I don't touch the stuff, unless it is free. I shoot up a nice speed ball in the bathroom. The combination of drugs and alcohol make it difficult to walk. Exactly what I was wanting. It's after 4 am. Debs must have walked home or something. I was doing coke with this girl I met and didn't notice he was gone. It doesn't matter though. Travis shows up. He has a few grams of meth. Fuck it, I'll roll a bowl. We smoke up. Crazy thoughts arise as we talk of the old days. So many burglaries and robberies to support our habits. That was before prison. That was before I was even 21. Old habits die hard. My skin crawls on my skeleton. I know I look like hell. I just got out of the hospital 6 days ago. It doesn't matter though. I know what I'm doing. I know how this will most likely end. My body can barely handle what I put it through, and my mind surely can't any more. I hope this comedown is the last.

To be continued.