What Am I?

I turn my back to find a way to tell you that I care
but when I find the words and turn with that smile
The wind of loneliness presses on my back
and I'm standing here all alone.

Looking around for an answer of what happened
I can't even begin to wonder why
it all seemed to be going so well
and then you left me out to dry.

This isn't the first time this has happened
and I doubt it will be the last
but every time it hits me
I go tumbling down again.

The fire I just extinguished
it comes alive bright in my hands
burning and raging threatening to consume me
until all that's left is nothing but ash.

I look out in wonder
what have I done to make this happen?
Am I some kind of monster,
that everyone's trying to flee.