The Things You Are Now

a lack of a pillow and of a shape in my bed,
a sad smile quickly passing me by on the street,
a picture i can't throw away,
a song i can't listen to,
a collection of inside jokes i'll never tell again,
this poem,
this night's dream,
the reason i'll break down when i think i'm strongest,
a look in my eyes i won't forget,
the songs you wrote me,
the only one that give a fuck,
the only one that mattered to me,
the one who taught me to love,
just every part of myself i'm locking away,
every part i lost of myself,
and happier