I Used You Used Me

For so long I felt so guilt for using you
For choosing you and abusing you
For making you the object of my misguided hero complex
But who am I kidding?
It was mostly about sex.
At least it started that out way
But the night dawned into day
And in the light
It was hard to deny
Try as I might
That you were something special.
And I wanted to be special too.
Your brokenness I misconstrued
For complexity
Your stubbornness for masculinity
And I marveled in the serendipity of it all.
So I took all that was in you
Hoping to become a better version of myself
I left you with a name and a face
And sparingly little else.

And I felt guilty for using you
For skewing you into something barely human
Little did I know it was all your master plan
That you were running the show all along.
I didn't take anything from you
You poured it all into me
Intentionally
To rid yourself of your debris
So you could start anew
So you could redefine You
Leaving scratch marks in lieu of thanks.
You had a tendency to overdo
But I took that from you too.
And for so long I felt so guilty
But was it really I who used you?