Novocain never helped.
They give me shots to stop the pain
But they don’t realize it never goes away.
The more I hurt the more I gain.
The pain I feel is here to stay.
When they come in to check on me
This is all they really say:
“You’re healing pretty fast I see.
Every thing will be okay.”
I turn to my imaginary friend
“They know what they’re talking about.”
But I just shake my head.
“Lying to me with out a doubt.”
And as I look into his blood red eyes
I think about what I’m saying.
Silently I start to cry.
What’s the point in staying?
I’m wrapped in his warm hug
“What’s the point in leaving?”
I sigh and shrug.
“Why is lie in believing?”
I tell him what’s been on my mind.
And explain it all.
And I tell him I was left behind.
“I’m always there to catch your fall.”
“Why should I stay?
There’s no one to tell
There’s nothing to say
When your world just fell.
When you can’t go to a warm home
A place where you feel loved.
Instead you have to live alone.
Because she’s in the world above.
There’s no one there to wipe your tears.
No one to cry with you.
No one there to take away your fears.
No one to hold on to.
No one there when you feel like dieing.
When you feel like locking yourself away
And just keep on crying
Until all you do is decay
And you hope no one finds you
And if they do you’re body’s a disaster
That’s exactly what you want to do.
Or maybe take a gun to make it go faster.
Just when you feel that way
They take you in their arms
‘I promise it’ll be okay’
And nothing can do you harm.
And when you look into their eyes
You say ‘I just love you’
And you both just start to cry.
Then they say ‘I love you, too’
They tell you that matters is you.
How you feel and what you feel.
And not to worry what other people do.
To tell other people ‘deal’
Then it gets all quiet.
And then you realize something.
That whole reason you put you that riot.
And you know now you’re not nothing.
You realize that someone out there-
Some one you always loved-
And that someone does care
And that you’re really not unloved.
You pull away and look at that someone
‘If wasn’t for you, I’d be gone’
You feel like your life has just begun.
And that you know you’ll live to see dawn.
And you know you’ll always be their ‘baby’
Or their sweet heart
Or maybe just maybe
Their favorite work of art
Then you feel like you’ve got it all.
You feel like nothing can break the bond.
You know that they’re there to catch you’re fall.
And you know they don’t need to respond.
But as for me, well, I lost it all.
You feel like no one cares anymore.
Like there’s no point in standing tall.
And nothings the same as it was before.”
I let a tear run dawn my cheek
And I bite my lip to keep it all in.
But I try to talk and I can’t speak.
And every tear burns m skin.
My friend, he looks at me
His eyes swollen, puffy and red
Then he cries and hugs me.
And the he pulled away and said:
“I don’t quite know that feeling.
But seeing you like this almost makes me feel the same
You’re heart is gonna need some healing.
And I know that you don’t like this game.
But maybe I can help you
Maybe I can try.
I’ll be that one to help you through
And when you cry so will I.”
Then he took me in his arms.
And I knew he had more to say.
And that moment I felt that I would be unharmed
“I promise it’ll be okay.”
I squeezed him harder than ever before
And buried my face in his black coat
“Every day I love you more and more”
I said weakly because of my throat.
Suddenly my friends walk in.
And they’re real.
I sighed and thought ‘let the story begin’
But they already knew the deal.
They heard everything I told him.
And they offered to help me out.
I told them they had to forget they saw him.
I knew they would with out a doubt.
So that night after they leave
Only moon light shines in my room.
I wipe my face off with my sleeve
And I take in the sheet’s soft perfume.
The light casts shadows that I used to be scared of
And I remember what my father used to say
“These shadows are one’s you’ll come to love”
And now I look back on those days.
I used to cry because the shadows scared me.
And every night my dad would come in
And he’d give them genders, he’s and she’s.
And some of them would be twins.
Soon the shadows were my friends.
And I still like to think that they are.
I still believe they’ll protect me till the end.
And the ‘evil monsters’ will stay afar.
Ever since then I’ve sleep with out a fear
And so I closed my eyes.
But I still shed a tear.
I thought about the fact that both of my parents died.
My father died when I was ten
All because of a drunk driver.
It’s been me and my mother since then.
And now I’m the last survivor.
My mother passed only hours ago
She had heart cancer.
I was there and it happened so slow.
If that’s a good enough answer.
It’s this hospital room I’m in.
There’re so many memories about this place
And so much more lies within.
And before I fall asleep I see their face.
The next day a woman comes to visit me.
She had the eyes of the devil
And the smile of an angel I guarantee
My thoughts went to the next level.
This woman was my grandmother.
My aunt had her eyes.
And a smile like my mother’s.
And then she cries.
She gave me an envelope from my mother.
I took it out and read the note.
I shed one tear after another.
And I cried about what my mom wrote.
This letter was about me.
She told gram she couldn’t leave me behind.
She knew about her cancer, which I couldn’t believe.
And she wrote down everything on her mind.
Hours later she was gone.
My imaginary friend read her letter over and over.
And my thoughts went on
And I thought ‘he’s my four leaf clover’
“You were sent to watch me.
By my father, right?”
He pulled up a chair beside me.
“I don’t know anymore. I have bad sight.”
We thought for a bit
“Well… what am I?”
“You’re both. How about it?”
He smiled “There’s nothing I can deny”
My other friends walked came.
I told them everything that occurred.
I showed them the note and they did the same
As I did and we didn’t even say a word.
I’m lucky I have more than one to watch over me.
And they’re all my best friends.
Always there no matter what the problem may be.
This relation will never end.
They’re ways there for me.
And they’re my heroes either way.
And that’s the way it should be.
And that’s the way I hope it stays.
But they don’t realize it never goes away.
The more I hurt the more I gain.
The pain I feel is here to stay.
When they come in to check on me
This is all they really say:
“You’re healing pretty fast I see.
Every thing will be okay.”
I turn to my imaginary friend
“They know what they’re talking about.”
But I just shake my head.
“Lying to me with out a doubt.”
And as I look into his blood red eyes
I think about what I’m saying.
Silently I start to cry.
What’s the point in staying?
I’m wrapped in his warm hug
“What’s the point in leaving?”
I sigh and shrug.
“Why is lie in believing?”
I tell him what’s been on my mind.
And explain it all.
And I tell him I was left behind.
“I’m always there to catch your fall.”
“Why should I stay?
There’s no one to tell
There’s nothing to say
When your world just fell.
When you can’t go to a warm home
A place where you feel loved.
Instead you have to live alone.
Because she’s in the world above.
There’s no one there to wipe your tears.
No one to cry with you.
No one there to take away your fears.
No one to hold on to.
No one there when you feel like dieing.
When you feel like locking yourself away
And just keep on crying
Until all you do is decay
And you hope no one finds you
And if they do you’re body’s a disaster
That’s exactly what you want to do.
Or maybe take a gun to make it go faster.
Just when you feel that way
They take you in their arms
‘I promise it’ll be okay’
And nothing can do you harm.
And when you look into their eyes
You say ‘I just love you’
And you both just start to cry.
Then they say ‘I love you, too’
They tell you that matters is you.
How you feel and what you feel.
And not to worry what other people do.
To tell other people ‘deal’
Then it gets all quiet.
And then you realize something.
That whole reason you put you that riot.
And you know now you’re not nothing.
You realize that someone out there-
Some one you always loved-
And that someone does care
And that you’re really not unloved.
You pull away and look at that someone
‘If wasn’t for you, I’d be gone’
You feel like your life has just begun.
And that you know you’ll live to see dawn.
And you know you’ll always be their ‘baby’
Or their sweet heart
Or maybe just maybe
Their favorite work of art
Then you feel like you’ve got it all.
You feel like nothing can break the bond.
You know that they’re there to catch you’re fall.
And you know they don’t need to respond.
But as for me, well, I lost it all.
You feel like no one cares anymore.
Like there’s no point in standing tall.
And nothings the same as it was before.”
I let a tear run dawn my cheek
And I bite my lip to keep it all in.
But I try to talk and I can’t speak.
And every tear burns m skin.
My friend, he looks at me
His eyes swollen, puffy and red
Then he cries and hugs me.
And the he pulled away and said:
“I don’t quite know that feeling.
But seeing you like this almost makes me feel the same
You’re heart is gonna need some healing.
And I know that you don’t like this game.
But maybe I can help you
Maybe I can try.
I’ll be that one to help you through
And when you cry so will I.”
Then he took me in his arms.
And I knew he had more to say.
And that moment I felt that I would be unharmed
“I promise it’ll be okay.”
I squeezed him harder than ever before
And buried my face in his black coat
“Every day I love you more and more”
I said weakly because of my throat.
Suddenly my friends walk in.
And they’re real.
I sighed and thought ‘let the story begin’
But they already knew the deal.
They heard everything I told him.
And they offered to help me out.
I told them they had to forget they saw him.
I knew they would with out a doubt.
So that night after they leave
Only moon light shines in my room.
I wipe my face off with my sleeve
And I take in the sheet’s soft perfume.
The light casts shadows that I used to be scared of
And I remember what my father used to say
“These shadows are one’s you’ll come to love”
And now I look back on those days.
I used to cry because the shadows scared me.
And every night my dad would come in
And he’d give them genders, he’s and she’s.
And some of them would be twins.
Soon the shadows were my friends.
And I still like to think that they are.
I still believe they’ll protect me till the end.
And the ‘evil monsters’ will stay afar.
Ever since then I’ve sleep with out a fear
And so I closed my eyes.
But I still shed a tear.
I thought about the fact that both of my parents died.
My father died when I was ten
All because of a drunk driver.
It’s been me and my mother since then.
And now I’m the last survivor.
My mother passed only hours ago
She had heart cancer.
I was there and it happened so slow.
If that’s a good enough answer.
It’s this hospital room I’m in.
There’re so many memories about this place
And so much more lies within.
And before I fall asleep I see their face.
The next day a woman comes to visit me.
She had the eyes of the devil
And the smile of an angel I guarantee
My thoughts went to the next level.
This woman was my grandmother.
My aunt had her eyes.
And a smile like my mother’s.
And then she cries.
She gave me an envelope from my mother.
I took it out and read the note.
I shed one tear after another.
And I cried about what my mom wrote.
This letter was about me.
She told gram she couldn’t leave me behind.
She knew about her cancer, which I couldn’t believe.
And she wrote down everything on her mind.
Hours later she was gone.
My imaginary friend read her letter over and over.
And my thoughts went on
And I thought ‘he’s my four leaf clover’
“You were sent to watch me.
By my father, right?”
He pulled up a chair beside me.
“I don’t know anymore. I have bad sight.”
We thought for a bit
“Well… what am I?”
“You’re both. How about it?”
He smiled “There’s nothing I can deny”
My other friends walked came.
I told them everything that occurred.
I showed them the note and they did the same
As I did and we didn’t even say a word.
I’m lucky I have more than one to watch over me.
And they’re all my best friends.
Always there no matter what the problem may be.
This relation will never end.
They’re ways there for me.
And they’re my heroes either way.
And that’s the way it should be.
And that’s the way I hope it stays.