Drunk Enough to Hate You

Drunk Enough to Hate You

There’s so much that I
Want to tell you.
And I’m slightly drunk.
Maybe very.
But we need to talk.
I’m in love with you,
You asshole.
And I know I can hide it
Like a fucking champ,
But god damnit.
Stop treating me like this.
Stop pretending you care.
Stop telling me things about you.
Stop smiling at me.
Stop it.
Stop saying you’ll be there,
When you know you won’t.
Stop making me think
You might actually care,
Because you’re never there.

I never feel your eyes on me
When I’m looking away.
I know you don’t care.
And I’m in love with you.
But I’m drunk,
So I can say this right now:
Don't come back tomorrow
And ask how it was.
Don't smile like you’re interested.
Don't try to get my attention.

I keep getting my hopes up -
Keep believing I might
be wrong.
Do my hair,
Dress pretty,
Go out when I don’t want to,
Just to spent time with you -
For what?
Crushing disappointment.

Why do you this to me?
Maybe you don’t know -
Because I sure as hell don’t.
But I am so fucking drunk,
And everything is funny,
But underneath,
In the back of my head,
I’m fucking furious.

I was excited for you to be here.
So excited to spend time with you.
And you said you’d come,
But you’re nowhere to be seen.
And I know,
You don’t owe me anything
Because we aren’t a thing,
But I’m drunk and giggly
And angry.
Because I know better,
But I keep getting
my fucking hopes up.
But instead of being a drunken mistake,
Lesson-learned story -
Fuck you.
Via a drunken spout of poetry.
I’m smart enough not to text
Or to call.
Even when I’m drunk.

You’ll always be an asshole,
And I’m working on the whole
Loving you thing,
But I won’t let you
Destroy this great fucking buzz.
I hope your night was
As great as mine,
But honestly,
I’ve got liquor in my blood,
And I’m dancing to a ticking clock,
So quite frankly,
I don’t give a fuck.