Mother, Smother

Sometimes,

I hate you.

And sometimes,

I wish you dead.

And sometimes,

I want to be the one that kills you.

But I cannot wish suffering and sadness upon you

despite the pain you might cause me.

Sometimes,

I wish you dead

but I’d be sad

if you were.
♠ ♠ ♠
Circa 2014. I was going through a rough patch with my mum a couple years ago and I was struggling with the intrusive thoughts it would bring after she upset me, so I wrote this. Don't worry, I don't actually want to kill her. Just, in the moment, I was very deeply hurt and the intrusive thoughts were making me angry, so I wrote them down instead.