Coward

Snowflakes fall from the bright white skies
And all I can recall is the look in your eyes
That first night it started snowing
You looked at me and you were glowing
A smile that stretched to each of your ears
Because you hadn't seen snow like that in years
You jumped in and nearly lost your phone
Still, you glowed

Atop my table sits a cup
But no steam is rising up
We drank hot cocoa every night
A ritual that felt natural; right
Now my cup is filled with liquor
I can't choke down anything thicker

In the shower, and a song plays loud
But all I hear's a ringing sound
As we stood in the kitchen and sang it together
I wonder when I'll sing it again; will I ever

Flipping and flopping between loud sobs and rage
The memories trapping me inside of a cage
That I can only break free of when I get pissed
Because only then will the tear soaked bars twist
Not eating, not sleeping
Screaming, weeping
Crying out for you to give a damn
But you don't want to care again
I'm falling apart, but you look grand
Smiling in every selfie – the attention you demand
While my expression is colder than stone
You're home, and you're home
You are where you feel you belong
And you are where I feel I belong
I can't believe you're gone
Coward