Miserable in Maroon: How I Manage Without Taking My Medication

a world waiting for the scythe

taking each moment: dissecting the seconds, minutes,

hours, days, weeks,

years

organization of your aging on the gravitational pull of the planet

seven:
you learn that wolves eat bunny rabbits
watching for their little tails in the tall grass on the hill
wanting first hand knowledge of the cute manifestation of life
and knowing you will never see that bunny rabbit again

a few months later you find an unhatched robin’s egg by the tree
you still dont understand

fourteen:
you learn loss is no stranger
accepting the idea yet unknowing that soon
you will try not to put yourself in a hospital bed
visions of the sweet isolation of an institution

but you dont even make a will

twenty one:
you learn loss is pervasive, imminent, ever lingering
no longer dreaming of anything
slipping into a state of consumerist sedation

scared to death of the scythe