Blessed Gift

Have you ever felt the crushing need
The itch, impulse to make yourself bleed.
There's no logic, no bias. It calls me to my grave.

It's been two years now.
A long time to go without
Your love.
And I am left here with my itch.
When I think of you,
It calls my name.

I know it sounds pathetic, I assure you
That I am fine
I just have this otherworldly desire
For myself to die.

Not out of depression, though it doesn't help.
Nor rage, nor hate.
I simply want to be killed
To meet my fate

Can you understand, I love you.
I am not right
I am not okay.
I love you
But I don't want to see another day.

It's not selfishness, it's not to escape.
I simply am tired of my ways.
It has no logic, no bias.
My need to die is just that
Some ethereal desire
An arcane addiction.
It is not you, though my heart hurts
Two long years without your touch
It's more than enough
To drive one insane.

I hold on for you, despite my madness.
You're the light at the end
I pray we meet again
I am not okay without you
My dear baby girl.

My heart bleeds without you
And my mind craves death
I am an unholy product
Blessed by your every breath.

I love you,
My daughter.