Afterlife

one step closer
to being split open
is free falling out of focus until you're floating
bottom of the ocean, flesh soaking and bones poking
out of the body that's completely alone and frozen
laying in the bottom hoping
this time they'll know that you're not joking

finally i cracked open my eyes
i saw god and he gave me some advise
life is loneliness, you'll be on your own forever
no amount of grave-received flowers will make it better

active decay keep me rotting from the day that started it all
since then life has become disappointment and downfall
as down as i did when i realized that was it
all that was given and it all was forbidden
honestly i'm not yet forgiven
but i need to get to heaven
so badly,
more than i need to die
i need to get up to the sky