Goner
Its been a long day, the night even longer
The sun slips away, the sky grows somber
I feel it on my face, cold winds to ponder
I'm feeling out of place, my mind's a goner
Melting in the rain, wilting in the sun
Constantly finding reasons to be undone
Always commiting myself to the gun
When I really just want it to be done!
You motherfucking owe me!
For everything that never was
For everything I couldnt have
Because, "I wasn't good enough."
Huh??
Whats wrong? Fucking cat got your tongue?
Can't owe up to all the damage you've done?!
Can't look me in my eyes and tell me it's fun?!
Cant say a motherfucking word! You just try
To justify the hurt!
Wear it like a mask and charade your worth
And then you dumped it all into my heart.
I was fucking nothing, and that wasnt enough
You wanted to see how far I could come
Before I break apart and turn to rust
So the seasons change and the years pass
Im still haunted by the echoes of a past.
I walk in the shoes of someone who isnt there..
And what do I have to show for this pain
Fucking nothing!
Especially when you show your face again
Acting like everything is fucking great again
Like you werent just here telling me to disappear
You said you would always be there..
When I needed you most
Ha...at least in that context you were right
You didnt lie
You were always there when I was down
I would feel sad and I would cry
And you were there to lay hands on me
Beat me up and tell me to die
You were always there to fucking hate me
And blame me for all the mistakes I was making
Even when I didnt do anything wrong
You said "Maybe, we can Replace Z."
As I bawled in the corner hoping this wasnt the place that..
I called home.
Such is life,
Maybe Ill "Man up"
And have better luck next time
I cant decide or not if I love you
Its easier to say I fucking hate you
Especially when you say its my fault
That I am who I am.
Yeah because it"s my fault..
It's my fault you abandoned me
When I was only 14
Its my fault that I was bullied by my own fucking family
A group of alcoholics with nothing but vanity,
Fucking drug addicts and they called ME insanity
I wonder if I wasnt alive, then what the plan would be
Would it be the picture perfect household of history
Times like this make me wish I cashed out my misery
So its my fault that Im a grown man,
Who still cries himself to sleep at the end of the day
Night terrors to keep manic depression at bay
Maybe a full dose of paranoia today,
with a nice Side of PTSD
Not sure why Im saying this
Shit..
Its just been a long day, night even longer..
The sun slips away..the sky grows somber..
I feel it on my face..cold winds to ponder..
Still feeling out of place, my mind is a goner..
The sun slips away, the sky grows somber
I feel it on my face, cold winds to ponder
I'm feeling out of place, my mind's a goner
Melting in the rain, wilting in the sun
Constantly finding reasons to be undone
Always commiting myself to the gun
When I really just want it to be done!
You motherfucking owe me!
For everything that never was
For everything I couldnt have
Because, "I wasn't good enough."
Huh??
Whats wrong? Fucking cat got your tongue?
Can't owe up to all the damage you've done?!
Can't look me in my eyes and tell me it's fun?!
Cant say a motherfucking word! You just try
To justify the hurt!
Wear it like a mask and charade your worth
And then you dumped it all into my heart.
I was fucking nothing, and that wasnt enough
You wanted to see how far I could come
Before I break apart and turn to rust
So the seasons change and the years pass
Im still haunted by the echoes of a past.
I walk in the shoes of someone who isnt there..
And what do I have to show for this pain
Fucking nothing!
Especially when you show your face again
Acting like everything is fucking great again
Like you werent just here telling me to disappear
You said you would always be there..
When I needed you most
Ha...at least in that context you were right
You didnt lie
You were always there when I was down
I would feel sad and I would cry
And you were there to lay hands on me
Beat me up and tell me to die
You were always there to fucking hate me
And blame me for all the mistakes I was making
Even when I didnt do anything wrong
You said "Maybe, we can Replace Z."
As I bawled in the corner hoping this wasnt the place that..
I called home.
Such is life,
Maybe Ill "Man up"
And have better luck next time
I cant decide or not if I love you
Its easier to say I fucking hate you
Especially when you say its my fault
That I am who I am.
Yeah because it"s my fault..
It's my fault you abandoned me
When I was only 14
Its my fault that I was bullied by my own fucking family
A group of alcoholics with nothing but vanity,
Fucking drug addicts and they called ME insanity
I wonder if I wasnt alive, then what the plan would be
Would it be the picture perfect household of history
Times like this make me wish I cashed out my misery
So its my fault that Im a grown man,
Who still cries himself to sleep at the end of the day
Night terrors to keep manic depression at bay
Maybe a full dose of paranoia today,
with a nice Side of PTSD
Not sure why Im saying this
Shit..
Its just been a long day, night even longer..
The sun slips away..the sky grows somber..
I feel it on my face..cold winds to ponder..
Still feeling out of place, my mind is a goner..