Running

You always said you loved me,
But in truth I never believed it.
Words are sometimes just words.
There's not always proof you mean it.
I wouldn't mind the struggle,
If there wasn't so much doubt.
But we're both so busy fighting inner demons
And raging wars within ourselves.
I feel like I've already lost you,
But maybe I'm the one that can't be found.
Lost in an ocean of worry,
When all I wanted was steady ground.
Maybe I have the tendency of pushing people away,
But maybe I'm not the only one here to blame.
You're problems are all valid and I understand why they hurt.
But you don't understand that my problems are often worse.
I don't,get to separate myself from the people who make me hurt.
You got your share of scars from a different kind of pain,
But my torment is mental and physical and its driving me insane.
But, how am I supposed to come to you with my problems,
When you can't even handle yours.
You gave up on yourself because it was the easier choice.
I don't want to run from my problems
the way you keep running from yours.
I love you, but in hurting and I don't know what to do.
Its hard to focus on my life when I'm struggling with you.